In Vegas for business and decided to stay at the new Aria Casino. This place is in the heart of the new City Center with the likes of the Cosmopolitan Hotel and some really amazing residence towers. Now there is a impressive list of Chef Restaurant here including Todd English, Jean George to name a few basically the best of the best.
The above photos are the opening act that we started with "Lobster and Pineapple" It was that, hack off a piece of freshly steamed lobster and slam it on a ring mold piece of pineapple and you have just made this dish and the best part is you can charge your friends $14 for it...neat huh. ok at this point I was sensing there was a hopped up asshole behind this restaurant but lets continue.
Ok , I need to preface this with the following. There is a potato dish in Beyrouth in a restaurant called Republica that is a potato dish which is sauteed crispy potatoes in garlic olive oil with this amazing aoli that has some mystery spice in it which for the $2 they charge almost pisses me off because it is so good its like crispy roasted potatoes on the outside almost like a good french fry outside with this melting creamy inside. Well this Potato Bandola was nothing like it in fact it was a dogs dinner. The color you can tell is a pale yellow/white (and i'd rather bob for apples in a sewer than learn Photoshop) and the center was hard and undercooked (ok Benny if its hard in the center it would be undercooked) anyhow and now is the time to drag my college into this , Rafi and I sent them back only to return from the MICROWAVE I am sure of this as the outside was soft and the inside PIPING HOT like it had been blasted in the microwave which they denied but I had a hunch. OK like Lindsay Lohan we have spent to much talking about this lucky to be cubed bits of s&^t I would toss to my dog if i had one at all.
Ok this waterlogged bloated jumbo white asparagus was good for dunking in the Marcel from Top Chef white foam mayo that had some coloring added to make it look like caramel, I smell pretentious ass here.... yes I do and so did my college. Moving on..
If you are gonna rip off Thomas Keller with his French Laundry Salmon Tartar cones at least make them taste of more than raw tuna on a won ton crisp. I ate one then Rafi and I jammed one each into our eyes so we would get at least some entertainment value out of it. Oh that crap in the other flower looking fried won ton was.....ok I cant remember it was that good.
Here it is, just seconds before I jammed it into my eye socket and blamed it on bad gravity. Right before it plummeted into my eye I only wished it would have turned into a mini chocolate ice cream cone and I would have shot wide and it would have hit my mouth. (no such lady luck tonight in Vegas)
This was a and I cant remember the menu description but ill give you mine "crepe wrapped Purina Cat Chow" with my moms God rest her soul beshamel cheese glue wall paper paste put some chive on it to disguise the S&^t dish that this was. We ate it, look at each other and said " $14 Cat Food?"
This was by far the best dish of the night. Pork belly with runny mozzarella cheese and some shaved Serrano ham and some useless background sauce that tasted of nothing but to make it look restaurant quality you need to dribble garbage juice on the plate I guess. This dish was like having Liv Tylers head on Betty Whites Body...cant I just have the head /pork belly???
Ok we will end with this, vienna sausages on some mash of may as well been flavorless mush on garbage juice (same s&*t they put on that other pork dish), I was gonna ask for $14 bucks is it house made but at this point Rafi was looking at me saying "Get the Bill" and he was talking over me saying "get the bill. So to summarize for $104usd plus $20 tip all we wished was that we got an %8 samich each and went to the room or we were eating at Al Seniour in Lebanon cause man can they make a good chicken and Hubbly Bubbly.
High Points: Mistakenly overpoured vodka for $10
Lowpoint: read review.
Remember we paid for this, and for $100 and change anyone would expect more than this underseanod mushy crap. Ive had amazing Spanish Tapas and trust me if Franco were alive he would come here and slap the Chef whoes name I will withhold out of respect that one day he will stop screwing everyone with his phony Spanish Tapas
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