Chef Benny Doro

A few thoughts about giving and many more about receiving for this upcoming Easter Dinner

These days we all like to give food, give compliments, give to charity to make us all feel better about ourselves. We do.... in North America I find have no capacity to receive graciously. When someone a complete stranger or perhaps a friend of a friend offers you some food they just made and really is giving it to you as a gesture of caring, an offering of respect and a gesture of a short but pleasing food experience are you accepting it on an arrogant level of "well I know food so let’s see what this is all about" or are you letting yourself be vulnerable and accept it as a small gift made by this person who has no idea who you are but really wants to give you a food experience from their efforts and really wanting you to  enjoy it.

This can be for some people like accepting money from a stranger when they have very little money. It can make you feel as if there is a room of people looking at you waiting for your often fake “oh this is delicious” because you are not even experiencing what  it’s tastes, aroma and texture is.  Next time you’re at a mom and pop restaurant and they bring you a little something you didn’t order but is on them and they really want you to try it, taste it, really think about that gesture and let your self be humbled for a moment and let them know what you thought and always accept with a thank you. If the food is good you know someone back there is caring not only from the kitchen but right through to the servers and the owners whom probably asked to have this morsel brought to you.

Everyone is always asking their inviting host what they can bring when invited to a holiday dinner and the answer is usually  “bring yourself”.  Most times It is because they want you to bring yourself and that means who you are into their home. Next time you’re at your friends family get together ask your host if you can go and see what they are doing in the kitchen and acknowledge the people making the food for you.  Go see what they are making, you will probably be offered some sample of something they are making, accept it, taste it, tell them what you really think, if they are looking for an opinion let them know if it needs more seasoning or its just perfect the way it is.  Ask a little bit about the food and why someone is preparing a certain dish there is usually a good story behind it and why they are making that particular dish.  Often one person is making a dish because he or she was taught by their family and they for some reason are the only one that can make taste like Grandma used to make. What you will see is the caring that is going into that food and the pride of someone who is cooking not only for their family but their family’s friends. This for me makes the food taste that much more special knowing the people and their hands that made my meal.

If asked by your hosts to bring a little something for dessert, please make a little effort to make something to bring. Your host are going through the effort of preparing from scratch a meal to be shared by everyone together, don’t cheapen it by buying a cake from the supermarket. Spend 35 min at home and make some simple cookies that would go well with tea or coffee (butter, sugar, flour, salt, vanilla extract and eggs) . By bringing something you made into their home that will be enjoyed by all will do the same to them as their gesture should to you . Your hosts will feel humbled and gracious that you took the time to make something with your own hands to be shared by everyone. I think if we all just took that moment to have this exchange it somehow brings everyone together a little more at a special occasion like  Easter dinner.

My Best,

 

Benny Doro